Mistletoe was everywhere, and all you wanted to do was love people and feed the world.

The holiday season inspires us to be more giving and loving. Some of us even promise ourselves to be more like our holiday-selves all year long.

And then, sometime shortly after our New Year’s resolutions are forgotten, our volunteer work, and charitable contributions are reduced as life takes over.

Maybe you still give, but do you do it in the same way as you did in December? Are you as moved? Are you as compelled to help the helpless?

Adam from Man vs. Debt posed the following question: “Do you give to Panhandlers” and the comments (all 215 of them) were really interesting. Here are a few examples:

• “In the US, I don’t give money to panhandlers. I just assume many of them are going to use it on drink and quite honestly, I don’t want to encourage more of them to hang out on street corners asking for money. Because I can’t assess their true “need” situation, I’m not comfortable giving them cash.”
• If I have something to give – I give. I believe I’ve been blessed to be a blessing to others.
• I am a very giving person but when it comes to pan handlers, I am not so giving. Not to say I don’t help any pan handlers, I just am very leery when they approach me. I feel most of the time they are lying about why they need the money. It just doesn’t fly with me. I also think many choose to live that way.

Here’s your invitation to give freely:

Let go of your need to decide who deserves what. That’s not your job, or responsibility. It feels good to give without judgement. Give your spare change to panhandlers, or a cup of coffee, or a meal. Keep snack packs and bottled water in your car to distribute when you have the opportunity. Make sandwiches and give them away to people in need at a park in your community.

Reasons people don’t give
• They feel uncomfortable
• They think the money will be used for drugs
• They think people should help themselves
• They think someone else will help
• They are strapped financially
• They think they are supporting homelessness

Instead of thinking, analyzing and judging, give what you can. Remember that many people asking us for help may not be able to navigate government programs for assistance. Most people standing by the side the road, or under a bridge did not choose this lifestyle because they are too lazy to work. There are mental, physical and social issues that stand between them and the life we might think they should lead.

You are not considering whether or not to sign over your 401K, give your home away or sell your house and donate 1/2, so don’t put so much pressure on the decision. Remember, it’s an invitation. An invitation to brighten someones day, an invitation to judge less and give more.

If you give freely, you will not make someone an alcoholic, keep someone on the streets, or perpetuate homelessness. It may be a dollar to you, but be open to the possibility that you are giving one person hope with your contribution.

Do you give freely? Will you?

Like every American, I have been struck by the tragedy of the Tucson Massacre last weekend. Innocent people died that day… good people died that day… a 9-year old girl died that day.

And while the jury is still out on the exact motivation of the killer, one thing became clear during last night’s Memorial Service in Tucson: the United States of America must once again become united. We are one nation. We are one people. We are one piece in the only world we’ve got. And while we need not agree on all points of politics, we must make every effort to pursue unity.

- We need humility. Our specific political party does not hold all of the answers. During my short lifetime, on numerous occasions, both political parties have held significant majorities in government. But our problems still exist. It is clear that no one, single political party holds all the answers. In other words, we need each other.
- We need patience. Our problems did not start overnight. And they will not be solved overnight.
- We need appreciation. Republicans love and serve America. Democrats love and serve America. The sooner we appreciate that fact (and our differences), the sooner we can work together towards a common goal.
- We need to stop assuming intentions. Our nation faces problems – it always has and always will. And good people will always differ on the best solution. But making sweeping assumptions about an opposing viewpoints’ intentions will never move the debate forward. It is the easiest way to discount any valid, opposing argument. It is also one of the most damaging. In fact, in my opinion, it is one of the primary reasons that civility has completely vanished from our political discourse.
- We need maturity. We can not afford any longer to be tossed back and forth by men or women who profit from sharp, stinging, political discourse. Debating politics in the public arena is good and to be encouraged. But dividing the country for the sake of profit is not.
- We need wholesome talk. Remove falsehood, rumors, and gossip. Instead, our words need to benefit anyone who will listen and build up everyone who hears them.
- We need less bitterness, rage, anger, and slander. These attitudes and actions always escalate and only produce more of themselves. They have never resulted in solutions… and they never will.
- We need more kindness, forgiveness, and compassion. Towards each other – in our daily lives and in our politics.

I’m not naive enough to think that the simple application of “patience,” “appreciation,” or “wholesome talk” will solve our world’s complicated problems. But I do think they hold the key to uniting this country once again… or at least, enough to prevent the senseless death of good, innocent people.

And that’s one thing all of us can agree on.

Don’t worry about missing life, life will happen to you no matter what you do. There will be joys and celebrations. There will be nights crossing bridges you don’t know the name of when some unspeakable beauty envelopes you. There will be nights looking from windows upon the staggered lights of some town when some unspeakable sadness envelopes you. There will be people you love who you can no longer find your way to. There will be new discoveries, new clouds that resemble strange and terrible things, tangerines and hangovers, and long, long telephone calls made of almost entirely silence. There will be enormous pains and small pains that are almost pleasurable. There will be haiku that suddenly make sense, and the feeling that something has been taken from you, and songs, always songs. So don’t worry about missing life, it’s like missing the sky, you can’t, you’ll always be under it and in it and sometimes high in it, but often just on the ground, moving from thing to do to, needing, crying, making people laugh, although it’s hard to tell what they’re laughing about because it seems you were just talking about how terrible life is.

The more you try to earn your freedom, the more trapped you become.

I’m not the bah-humbug type, well at least not since I stopped working retail.  The holiday has no religious significance for me, but I do appreciate the idea of a season (supposedly) dedicated to the ideas of peace, love, and taking care of others.  I don’t spend a weekend stringing lights all over my house, but I do appreciate the lights that the town puts up, and the displays that some of our neighbors create.  This year I got a little Charlie Brown tree, but it’s a potted tree that I will take out to my parents ranch and plant once Christmas is over.  Why spend $60+ on a cut tree to sit in the house for 3 weeks before throwing it in the trash?  What a waste.  My tree was a mere $12, and if I’m lucky I’ll be able to dig it up for Christmas next year and replant it again.

I don’t really do gifts, but I love getting together with friends and family during the holiday season.  I’ve never been one to spend next years money on this years gifts.  This year I’ve decided to pick an angel from the angel tree for each of my family members and shop in their name for someone who may otherwise not have a Christmas.  My family has never been big on giving “stuff” (most of which will end up in the Goodwill box), so I know they will appreciate it.  Besides, my Mom would have my brother and I pick out several angels every year when we were little, so it’s more or less tradition, right?  This year I found an elderly man, who is probably in a nursing home, who just wanted an alarm clock.  How sad.  Needless to say he will be getting much more than just a clock.

Basically, I’ve taken all of the stressful aspects of Christmas and eliminated them and that has left ample time to enjoy the parts of the season that I find pleasant.  December is not a stressful month in my house – it’s pretty much the same as any other month, but with a bit more time spent with family and friends. I yours is equally as stress-free.

- George Harrison, All Things Must Pass

Etsy Jingle Bash this Saturday with the girls. Yes, please!

This is where I grew up…

 and I can’t wait to go home this weekend and go fishin’ with my Dadoo!

Love the city but miss Hallsville, TX…and Wendy!